


Who is Cas?

by Crossroads_Castiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: I'm Sorry, Implied Castiel/Dean Winchester, M/M, Memory Loss, Mutual Pining, POV Sam Winchester, Sad Ending, Season/Series 12
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 00:58:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9632657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crossroads_Castiel/pseuds/Crossroads_Castiel
Summary: Based on 12x11, Regarding Dean. Dean has lost his memory and Sam is trying to help him remember. Dean remembers a few things about a Angel. Kind of sad, unresolved ending...I'm sorry XD





	

“Who is Cas again?” Dean stared at the sticky note with a blank face, none of the names having any associations at all to his hexed brain. His brows knitted together in concentration, trying to remember. It was like water running through his fingertips. 

Sam sighed, more frustrated than annoyed. He had just gotten off the phone with Castiel and was waiting for Rowena. He didn’t want her involved but Cas agreed she was their best bet.

“Cas is your best friend.” Sam said for what felt like the hundredth time today. Dean kept going back to that name. 

“How did I meet him?” Dean said with no enthusiasm. He seemed almost bored as he took a sip from the water bottle that was opened on the desk. 

Sam laughed a short, alarmed laugh as he ran his fingers through his hair. “Umm. At work…I guess you could say…”

Dean cocked his head to the side and his brow drew down as if he was skeptical. “We work together?”

“Yeah, for about eight years now,” Sam said, discomfort creeping into his voice. 

“Tell me about that,” Dean said as he looked over at his brother with the beginnings of interest. 

Sam squirmed in his seat but knew he didn’t need Dean to get to stop trusting him or he might bolt and he’d never find him quickly in his condition. “Well, Cas worked for another….company….that was trying to recruit you to work for them. He got you out of….a really bad situation… and he was supposed to help recruit you but he found out the…company…wasn’t a good company to work for. They lied, were bad to their employees, etc. He eventually stopped you from working for them and he left too, and you two have been kind of inseparable ever since. Sometimes the company executives try to get Cas to come back and work for them and it always ends badly, but he is a really, really loyal friend to you.”

Dean cocked his head to the side and his finger tapped next to the name on the paper. “There’s more to it than that…It’s like…right on the tip of my tongue.” Dean rolled his eyes in frustration and squeezed his eyes shut. “Blue,” he said assuredly. “His name makes me think of blue.”

Sam quirked an eyebrow. Dean could barely remember anyone’s name or his own….”Blue is the color of his eyes and he’s always wore a blue tie.” 

Dean shook his head adamantly. “That’s not it. Not all of it. But yeah…really, really blue eyes right? There’s something _about_ his tie too…or was?”

Sam’s eyes widened more. He wondered if this wasn’t his opportunity to find out more about those two and their feelings. “Right, Dean! He used to wear his tie flipped around.”

“That’s weird…he’s kind of a weird, dorky guy huh?” Sam’s head shot up as Dean smiled softly. 

“Dean…how do you feel when you think about Cas?” Sam said softly, without any words leading him on. He leaned his left elbow on the table and hunched over in his chair with an air of casual conversation. He felt tense however. _Something_ was going with those two and he was going to find out what. For once Dean took his request seriously. He closed his eyes and sat calmly. Sam assumed he was thinking. Hell, maybe he’d forgotten how to open his eyes. 

“Safe,” Dean said softly and Sam leaned in to hear him better. “I feel safe when I think about him, like he protects me? Like I can trust him.” 

Sam nodded softly. “You trust him with your life. He’s saved you a lot…Anything else?”

Dean sighed again and rubbed his temples. “Peaceful. I feel really peaceful. That doesn’t make any sense…” 

Sam nodded to himself. He knew when Dean was with Castiel he was different. He didn’t want to discourage Dean’s memories. He was remembering, even if it was only fragments. This would at least keep them busy and maybe slow down the loss until Rowena got there. “No, it does. Cas is….He’s…he’s kinda like your “guardian angel”, you know, watching over you,” Sam said, trying to lighten the mood with a soft laugh but Dean’s eyes flew open and they slowly drug over to Sam. 

“ _My_ Angel,” Dean growled out softly. He leaned over and whispered, despite them being utterly alone in the hotel room. “He’s my Angel…like a _real_ one…and he likes me…like, likes me likes me.”

Sam’s eyes widened with discomfort and alarm. He sat up rigidly in his chair. “Um, well, Angel I can say…yeah he is. The other part, I mean, I don’t know…” He trailed off as he rubbed the back of his neck. 

“No, he does. We’ve talked…me and my Angel…but we both said my brother wouldn’t like it…he’d think I was choosing my Angel over my brother,” Dean said this all with calm assuredness that made Sam’s stomach tighten. Apparently Dean had forgotten who he was talking to for a moment but then he drug his eyes up to meet Sam’s again. “You’re my brother…Sam. I’m sorry. I forgot for a second. We can stop talking about….Cas…right? We can stop talking about him now.”

“Dean…I…” Sam stuttered out. 

“I said we can stop talking about him now, Sammy,” Dean said with venom creeping into his tone. He sat the paper down on the table and abruptly walked off from the desk. 

“You called me Sammy…” Sam said quietly after some time had passed. “That’s your nickname for me.” Dean stood staring out the hotel window, the sun making him a dark silhouette. “Dean, listen, you may not remember this later but I wouldn’t…you know…mind, you and Cas together. I know I said some things about you putting others in front of me, but I never meant…”

Slowly, Dean turned around and looked blank faced at Sam. “Who are you, again?” Sam squeezed his eyes shut in pained frustration and stood up, sat Dean back down at the table, and showed him the list again. “I’m your brother, Sam. Mary Winchester is your mother. Castiel is…your best friend.”


End file.
